Tag: memories

I Only Say It Because I Mean It With All My Heart

“When I say, “I love you,” it’s not because I want you or because I can’t have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I’ve seen your kindness and your strength. I’ve seen the best and the worst of you. And I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are.”

- Joss Whedon

Being Apart Doesn’t Mean…

“Being apart from people you love doesn’t mean you love them any less.. it may mean you love them even more.”

2010

It’s 2010. It seems like only yesterday it was 2009. How time flies so fast. I still remember all the rage about 2000, that was just a decade ago. The commotion on the Y2K bug and what nots.

Here we are at 2010. Am going to be a quarter of a century. Does it make me feel old? Well not really, age has always been a number to me.

What was 2009 like for you? It’s been a totally crazy rollercoaster ride for me. Falling really sick to the point staying in bed for a week was the only way to get better. Broke my heart, lost my faith in love. Discovered who my true friends are and who was just a foe to use me for their on needs. Leaped jobs. Met amazing new friends. Patch up with old friends and the friendship grew much stronger.

Honestly it was overwhelming for me. To cope on my own without someone to share it with. But I pulled through and here I am still smiling and standing. I’ve lost tremendous weight and is still in the process of gaining it. Slowly I’ll get there.

I’ve accomplished most of the things that I wanted last year. As for 2010, I am not sure what awaits me but am game for it. I’ll play my very best. 2010’s resolution are more or less along the same as last year’s but more. More personal goals.

Happy 2010!!!

Fingers

“God made spaces between our fingers so someone else could fill the gap”.

- Unknown

Mr 6th

Deep inside, I will always remember this day then. A happy day of mine. Or perhaps one of the happiest days in my life. Til then…it’d be a beautiful memory of mine. Oh Mr 6th you have been missed.

xx

My Mobile Journey

I started using a mobile phone aka handphone aka cellphone when I was at the age of 13. Why so early you must be wondering. Because I attended choir practise every few nights. The practises were from 8 til 10 at night. Which is pretty late for someone that young.

The place was also deserted, dark and far out from the city. So the handphone became very handy if my parents were late. Unfortunately when I started using handphones, there was only fixed lines offered. Maxis and Celcom were the only service provider back then. I opted for Maxis. The price of a phone call was a shocking 60sen per second I think. There was still no SMS. I could get service SMS but no SMS sending services then. My very first phone was a blue Alcatel One Touch. Hehe. What a chunky monkey with an antenna that stretches out as well.

Alcatel One Touch

Alcatel One Touch

A few years after that, they introduced the SMS. I tell you, that was when I was extremely happy. Then came out the Prepaid also. How cool was that. I gave that a try. I tried the Celcom prepaid and also the TimeCel prepaid. Eventually I bought a Maxis prepaid. Well back to the SMS technology, at that time you could only text to your fellow network users. So it was only Celcom to Celcom and Maxis to Maxis. Then I remembered at 16, it was a full blown SMS technology where we could SMS to anyone on any network. I went crazy and that was when my texting obsession kicked in. I was then using a Siemens handphone, it was tiny and had a small antenna. It was dark blue in colour. It could fit so nicely in my pencil case or my small handbags. Those small bags were so fashionable back then.

When I was 17, there was a new craze. The different colour back lights for handphones. First was the blue light, then came the greenish light then the white light. I then had the blue light phone. A Nokia, my very first one. It was small compact and it had Polyphonic ringtones. My god, that was just uber cool at that time. I could also change the casing according to my outfit. It was pure bliss. Oh, the keypad was shaped like a butterfly something I like too. I also love the colour turquoise, so yes this was a perfect match for me. At that point of time, we were introduced with emoticons and also “picture messaging”. Some were templates and some were images drawn using the symbols. It was mighty awesome. Hehe.

Nokia 8250

Nokia 8250

Then came the big leap in life, when we all stopped seeing things in monochrome. The coloured handphone. Up next was the camera phone. MMS was going places. So, I got myself a Nokia 7250. Interchangeable casing, with polyphonic ringtones, camera and colour screen. It was a prize possession to own such a cool phone. I had a few casings as well. Purple, grey and turquoise. I was a happy girl. Oh, my friends and I went on a photo frenzy. We seem to be taking pictures of our daily lives. It was a lot of fun.

Nokia 7250

Nokia 7250

Then it mobile technology upgraded. We can now use mp3 ringtones. Everybody had some song going on. MMS got cheaper. There was a ringtone service where you could download for RM3. Handphones felt more personalize, our own casing, our own theme, own wallpapers. How cool was that.

If you thought that it would all end there, you were wrong. Next up I got a Nokia 6230. It was the first ever that had an expandable external memory. It was pretty sleek as well. Changeable cover as well. I could install games, upload mp3s to listen to and take more photos as there was more storage.

Nokia 6230

Nokia 6230

Since I just love handphones, gadgets and what nots. I was always following up with technology and everything new. It was then when I fell in love with a slider phone. It was just cool to me. It had even more features now. I could install themes too. There was also a small little caller image. It was the Nokia 6270. This phone lasted me so long. Had so many new things I could do with. I had special ringtones for every group. I edited my own ringtones. Hehe. Talk about semangat.

Nokia 6270

Nokia 6270

But sadly my trusty phone came to an end. Everything was going wrong with it. Couldn’t receive calls but could receive texts. I had to let it go. So I was hunting for a new phone at that time and the Motorola E6 Rokr was out at that time. Sadly they didn’t sell it in Australia. My heart was locked on it already at that point of time. It was just rocking with awesome features. So, I bought one on ebay. I was quite happy with it. Though the camera wasn’t so good. It was cool to join the Motorola band wagon. Not only cause I wanted to join the band wagon, the name had it’s on meaning to me as well.  I didn’t realize I was a klutz, I kept losing and misplacing my stylus. So I gave in and hunted for something else.

Motorola Rokr E6

Motorola Rokr E6

I got yet another good deal on ebay and got myself a Samsung U700. It was the prettiest thing ever. Silver, mirror function, slider, slim, 3G and the whole works. I love it to bits. I used it for such a long period before it crapped out on me of old age. But man, I love this phone. It says me in so many ways.

Samsung U700

Samsung U700

A good phone came to it’s last breath. So what next? I went back to Nokia. As they had this really cool QWERTY handphone. The E71. I liked it cause it had the QWERTY keypad, 3G, MMS, mp3, camera, applications and many more. Oh and also the name had a special meaning to me. But little did I know, updates were needed ever so often and it kept screwing me over. It’s still the phone am using as it is really practical and useful. User friendly too.

Nokia E71

Nokia E71

I know and I already feel the urge to get a new phone. I have a solid reason to it, which I shall not disclose here. I have no idea what to turn to. I want something that has everything and yet not too out there. Not too common. Not too flashy. Something I can use for work and play. Any suggestions?

Update : It’s starting to hang on me now. Dang.

Happy 59th Birthday Ayah!

Late At Night

It’s pretty late. Just finished watching a DVD. I’ve got things on my mind. Am happy yet sad at the same time.

My ex colleague just PMed me saying that the EHM2009 won a gold medal for the Effie Awards. Boy oh boy am I proud. I really didn’t expect it. It was a passion based project that I worked on. CSR, the earth and charity has always been something that I love doing.

I was one of the two Project Managers for that project. I knew that when I sent in my email to TKE, my director thought I didn’t know what I was getting myself into. Perhaps I was even a joke to them. But as I said, it’s based on my passion and my previous work with Unilever. I took it on.

I first discussed it with him when I got the blast email from TKE. He told me to give it a shot. Do something that I loved. So, I took the plunge and dove right into it. There were times when I myself thought I was kidding myself. I wanted to give up, wanted to hand the title over to someone else. He never failed to encourage me, telling me to prove everyone around me that they were wrong. Some ex-colleagues thought I was crazy enough to take that job as it was FOC. I had to sacrifice a lot of my personal time for it. It was good that I took it up. It occupied me during my lonelier days.

Having said all that, it was truly a remarkable experience. Working closely with WWF and all the top guns of LB. This little girl did leave her impact. I can do things bigger than me.

But as am typing away, deep inside…I wish I could share the joy I have over this award with him. I felt like texting him. Would he care? Perhaps not. So I shall share it with anybody who would be proud enough of me. This little girl who is trying to make it big in her very own life.

I Miss

1. I miss Brissy. Why? I miss the biccies, the ice break coffee, coffee log cake at Queen St and chocolates.
2. I miss playing dress up according to seasons. Especially Fall and Winter. I love layering. The boots. The stockings. Coats.
3. I miss getting up early for work. Dressing up as well.
4. I miss an awesome cup of mocha.
5. I miss cook-outs.
6. I miss my late night calls.
7. I miss going on a text frenzy.
8. I miss seating in the co-pilots seat, so that I can turn to my right and set eyes on someone I know who’ll keep me out of harm.
9. I miss having someone who would cut my chicken for me.
10. I miss my BBGS days.
11. I miss cruising around directionless.
12. I miss spending money on good food.
13. I miss shopping.

Target

Ever since I was a little girl, I had a mission in life. I had targets and goals to achieve. I was a go-getter, never settling for second best.

I excelled academically, did sports, played music, sang in the National Youth Choir, danced for MATIC and the list goes on. I was an over achiever all rounder.

I grew up, still driven as ever. But last year, everything changed. It all stopped abruptly. I lost the spark within me. I didn’t know who I was. I could not see my purpose. I slaved myself at work. Got totally engrossed in it. I forgot how to have fun. I couldn’t differentiate a friend to a foe.

I took a break from it all and am proud to say that I can finally see myself again. I know who my friends are. Who to turn to. Am slowly smiling again. At least I know now.

Currently am taking one thing at a time. No more juggling. No more trying to be wonderwoman. Am resetting my goals and putting my priorities first. I’ve got my drive within me. It’s always been in me. It never left. That thing that keeps me striving and keeps me alive.

Baby steps for now.

Sometimes

Sometimes I think I am ready to face the world head on.

Sometimes I come running to hide from the evil world.

Sometimes I think am alright.

Sometimes I don’t know how I am.

Sometimes I am all smiles.

Sometimes I am in tears.

Sometimes I miss you.

Sometimes I don’t.

Sometimes I wish to be with you.

Sometimes I love you.

Sometimes I miss you.

Sometimes I am confuse.

Sometimes emotions comes to quick and plays with my mind.

But never have I hated you.