Oh Buttercup!

I’m very selective with my cakes. I like them a certain way. A certain design. A certain taste/flavour.

My favourite birthday cake has got to be Chocolate Lady from Angel’s Cake House. A cake shop that no longer exist. The cake is pure divine. Two layers of moist chocolate cake stuck together with a generous layer of chocolate. Topped with chocolate and randomly shaved cooking chocolate. Surprisingly it isn’t too sweet.

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Raya Things

Raya is near approaching which means, Ramadhan is ending.

Raya does not feel the same after the passing of my Tok. She passed away during Ramadhan and it truly left an impact on me.

I normally run her Raya errands such as withdrawing money from her bank for her grandchildren’s “duit raya”, putting money into the angpau packets, prepare her handbag, do light makeup for her during Raya morning and this one I truly love. Every Raya, she has no butang baju. I’d always give her mine so she’d look proper.

As Raya approaches, I too have some errands to run.

  1. Get a haircut
  2. Manicure and pedicure
  3. Customise my baju raya – get the lining needed
  4. Buy a plant if time permits
  5. Service the car
  6. Change tires

What are your Raya prep? Do tell, would love to know!

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What You Say Differs

You know the phrase “Action speaks louder than words”, I agree with this 100%!

Recently I had experienced this issue in many scenarios; family, friendship and work.

A lot of the time people say something but does the total opposite. Or they agree to something, but do another thing.

Are people of late truly lacking a thing called integrity? It sucks to be honest when they don’t adhere to their words and promises.

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Old Playground

3Two Square is an old playground of mine. I worked in one of the 4A’s agencies there before I left permanently to work on my own. Had a meeting in the evening with an old colleague and a future client (Insyallah). Being there brought back memories of working in an agency how fun, tiring, interesting it was. Pitches, Pressos and many many late nights and working weekends.

I for one don’t regret my advertising days because it has taught me many valuable skills and lesson.

The meeting was brief but good. We got what we needed and decided to hangout since I’ve not spoken to my ex-colleague for a while now. It started off with weight as we are both under-weight and how impossible it is to gain. Then we went on to talk about mental health.

A topic so taboo among many, particularly the Malays. Anxiety, depression, suicidal and bi-polar. If you have it, it means you don’t pray to God enough. That is the stigma they have.

Different people have different mental state. Their mental health differs from others too. What triggers it, what helps reduce it and many other things. It was really comforting to be able to share and discuss what we are going through. It was definitely a discussion where I took mental notes on how to care and be more attentive to people who suffer from anxiety.

Just so you know, I don’t have anxiety. But there was a point of time in 2016, where I was constantly nervous, uneasy, my heartbeat was so fast and my chest was tight. Pressure machine could not detect my pulse. This was a time where I was so badly cheated by an asshole of an ex. I was put on Xanax to calm me down. But this was also when I sought peace in Allah. This was when I started to get close to Him. I pray more. I was consistent with my prayers. I did a lot of sunat prayers. In many ways, I am grateful I faced this ordeal as I grew spiritually and have a stronger love for Islam.

I suffer from depression. I do know I had this issue but I did know that it was serious till I actually sought help. At one point in my life where I felt scared, I was accused of many false things and such. I could not get out of bed. I could not even face the world. I was scared, I was scared to leave my safe place and I was so alone. I stayed in bed and slept for hours.

It was he who force it down on me to visit a shrink after an incident I faced. He was worried as he isn’t around and the time difference between us. I’m forever grateful that he was so persistent on me visiting his shrink.

Mental health is a serious issue. It is not something we go on all fours and pray to have it. Be gentle on others, you just don’t know what they are going through. Always be open to hear them out.

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Wonder Why

Sometimes I can’t help but wonder why are there double standards in life. Why do people treat others differently in the same situation? Why do people make statements and do the opposite? Why do people punish the innocent ones over their own mistakes?

I don’t like to compare, I really don’t. But sometimes, it hits me so bad that it makes me wonder. Am I not precious enough? Are everything stated by others just words? Which of it is true? Am I visible only when they are in need? What about me? Do I not matter? Or am I really just alone in this double standard life?

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Economical Beauty

My first taste of entrepreneurship was in 2008. That was when I got back from Brisbane. It started off as a side income to pay for my car. I sold clothes online or better known as a blogshop.

It was new to us in KL. Initially, I started sourcing locally, the choice was rather limited. You had to have the eye for what’s going to be in fashion and also not sell the exact thing your competitors did. Though it might seem like a small hobby to some. I actually registered my blogshop and even had a legit company account. My earnings were really steady and clothes sold out super fast.

My dad noticed how well it did and invested in it. Off I went to Guangzhou to shop! Oh, boy, did I shop! I even quit my day job as I was so stressed and suffered acute gastric too.

However, I did go back to a 9-5 again while maintaining my blogshop. I then co-founded another business that was also online based that eventually turned into a fulltime gruelling offline job.

2011 was when I ditched the corporate life for good. A thing about being an entrepreneur that I must be honest with you is the pay. You will definitely take a pay cut when you start. Some months you’d get paid late. Some months you’d get paid less. Some months there won’t even be enough to pay yourself. Eventually, it will get better, but there will be some dry spells depending on the nature of your business.

Due to my financial standing as an entrepreneur, I decided to save where I could. The first thing that I cut off from my day to day spending was coffee. Coffee is a mad love of mine. Nowadays, it is a self-reward when I nailed a brief or score a new client. Some rare occasions it would be a pick me up on my shittier creative rut days.

The second thing that went down the drain was my blow-outs. The third was the facials. I now do home facials which can be an absolutely relaxing thing. But I’m guilty of slapping a mask own while working.

The fourth is my makeup products. Nope, I didn’t ditch makeup. I got real with it. What do I mean by that? Read on.

Bobbi Brown was the first brand that I emersed myself into. My mother brought me to the counter in Jusco which was located at One Utama. I was in such awe. I had never seen so many shades of brown/nude. It was an endless train of colours. They had lipsticks, eyeshadows, blushers and so much more! It was magical. For years I swore by them for my foundation, concealer, powder, eyebrow pencil, eyeliner and lipstick. My favourite look to achieve with Bobbi Brown would have to be the smokey eyes with nude lips.

In 2014, I discovered Rimmel London during my travels. It became my daily go to. I wore this on my day to day adventures and stuck to Bobbi Brown for special occasions. I wasn’t adventurous with makeup you see. Not only that, I had sensitive skin. So I was rather afraid of unwanted breakouts.

Despite that, I was a lil more adventurous with my lipstick. I mixed drugstore buys with high-end ones.

2018, is the year I finally opened up myself to local products. Local Malaysian products. #supportlocal!

I now use Lurelle Beauty foundation in Natural for my regular days. Especially if I’m in a rush. It is lightweight yet gives a medium coverage. No need to conceal my tired eyes! Just two pumps and I’m golden! Here’s a picture of me as proof.

I had minimal makeup on. Just foundation, eyebrow pencil, a lil blusher and a dash of lipmatte. The lipmatte is from MaryR BeautyWhat I love about Lurelle’s foundation is it’s water-based and wudhu friendly. Perfect for me who wants to pray when I’m out and about. It is also SPF35! Yup 35 ladies. Great for our scorching hot weather!

Another new found love is MaryR’s lipmattes. They come in six colours.

  1. Lily
  2. Dahlia
  3. Sakura
  4. Hydrangea
  5. Carnation
  6. Azalea

They contain Argan oil. Making it particularly great to moist the skin. I just hate chapped lips when I’m wearing lipstick. I’m currently in UK and it’s cold and dry. So this is my go to! My favourites would be Sakura and Carnation. I even took it on my recent trip to Krakow. It definitely helps add colour to my face in the negative cold weather.

If you are in the mood for some self-reward, try these brands for a change! I’m indeed more open to local brands. They are reasonable and good! If you know of any other makeup brands that I ought to try, do drop a comment. Would love to hear about it!

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