A breakup is when a romantic relationship ends. It can be casual or even emotionally traumatizing.
Most of the time it would be life altering. I bet just about everyone has gone through a breakup. Some might have been a good smooth and mutual one. While some might have been a truly painful baseless one.
I’ve pondered over breakups and questioned myself. Why does a break up occur?
Sometimes it happens out of the blue. No arguments. No cheating. No third party. Nothing at all. One day, he/she calls it quit. When you ask why? There ain’t no solid reason at all. Has the love faded? No. It’s still strong. Did you grow apart? No.
Well here are some of the classic breakup reasons that I can think of.
1. “It’s not you, it’s me.”
– This must be pure bullshit to me.
– If it was you, what was it? Do tell.
2. “I’m holding you back from greater things in life and that’s not fair.”
– Before you go making statements like this, perhaps you ought to speak to he/she and find out for yourself.
– To the other party, you might be the best-est thing in life.
3. “I’m hurting you and making you sad.”
– Did he/she say this to you personally? If no, ask. Don’t assume.
4. The cheating game.
– You cheated. Game over?
– If you love him/her still. Why not try to make it work.
– People make mistakes.
– Apologize. Prove yourself to him/her.
– It hurts, but if the love is there. It’ll grow even stronger.
5. The third person.
– Before calling it quits, stop. Think and analyze things through.
– Is the new one going to provide with happiness, security and etc.
– Is it worth what you are giving up?
6. “It’s not the right time.”
– When is the right time. Please do tell.
– Don’t give up just because times are hard.
– Be patient. Take the journey together.
– Your love will grow stronger and invincible.
Hehe. Don’t I just sound like Doctor Lurve? Well no, I have had my fair share of breakups. My take on breakups… I think it’s devastating, sad, painful, heartbreaking, life altering, shocking and many more. Sometimes, words can even describe how it feels.
I don’t know why I have to go through it. But I have and had gone through it. I am human after all.
A breakup would not be all that difficult if both parties were honest. Spill all the beans. Don’t hide things. Don’t lie. Believe it or not. Girls will accept a breakup better if they knew the truth. As much as it will hurt and crush them. This gives them a higher chance of recovering and healing faster. When you lie, leave them hanging with all sorts of questions. They go into denials and they’ll still question you til they get the truth out.
Truth hurts, reality bites. It’ll make her a stronger person. By telling the truth, he/she will not make the same mistakes again.
I don’t know why but I believe that love is sacred. Love is nothing something that passes by us on a daily basis. Love itself is rare. It only comes around once. So if I was in love, I would definitely fight for it til the very last. I treasure love. I treasure the one I love even more. Don’t get me started on how I would be if I am in love. Hehe. That’s a story for another day.
Oh yea, there’s also the post breakup part which sucks. If both of you have decided to stay friends. Do actually stay friends. Don’t say baseless things just to be nice. If you want to be friends. Be a real friend. Remember a promise is a promise after all.
In short, if you are in a relationship. Let everyone know that it matters to you. Let them know you’re serious. Work hard for it. Fight for it. Love is the greatest power in the whole wide world.
To survive a breakup. Click here. A good article that’s just straight to the point. Click.
Here is one good break up song that says a lot.
“Never Ever” by All Saints
A few questions that I need to know
how you could ever hurt me so
I need to know what I’ve done wrong
and how long it’s been going on
Was it that I never paid enough attention?
Or did I not give enough affection?
Not only will your answers keep me sane
but I’ll know never to make the same mistake again
You can tell me to my face or even on the phone
You can write it in a letter, either way, I have to know
Did I never treat you right?
Did I always start the fight?
Either way, I’m going out of my mind
all the answers to my questions
I have to find
My head’s spinning
Boy, I’m in a daze
I feel isolated
Don’t wanna communicate
I’ll take a shower, I will scour
I will rub
To find peace of mind
The happy mind I once owned, yeah
Flexing vocabulary runs right through me
The alphabet runs right from A to Zed
Conversations, hesitations in my mind
You got my conscience asking questions that I can’t find
I’m not crazy
I’m sure I ain’t done nothing wrong, no
I’m just waiting
‘Cause I heard that this feeling
won’t last that long
Never ever have I ever felt so low
When you gonna take me out of this black hole?
Never ever have I ever felt so sad
The way I’m feeling yeah, you got me feeling really bad
Never ever have I had to find
I’ve had to dig away to find my own peace of mind
I’ve Never ever had my conscience to fight
The way I’m feeling, yeah, I just don’t feel right
I’ll keep searching
Deep within my soul
For all the answers
Don’t wanna hurt no more
I need peace, got to feel at ease
Need to be.
Free from pain – going insane
My heart aches, yeah
Sometimes vocabulary runs through my head
The alphabet runs right from A to Zed
Conversations, hesitations in my mind
You got my conscience asking questions that I can’t find
I’m not crazy,
I’m sure I ain’t done nothing wrong
I’m just waiting
‘Cause I heard that this feeling won’t last that long
Never ever have I ever felt so low
When ya gonna take me out of this black hole?
Never ever have I ever felt so sad
The way I’m feeling yeah, you got me feeling really bad
Never ever have I had to find
I’ve had to dig away to find my own peace of mind
I’ve Never ever had my conscience to fight
The way I’m feeling, yeah, I just don’t feel right x4
You can tell me to my face,
You can tell me on the phone,
Uh, You can write it in a letter, babe
‘Cause I really need to know
You can write it in a letter, babe
You can write it in a letter, babe
